Im going to try some positive thinking..
1. Chocolate
2. Coke - as in the drink
3. Bunny Rabbits
4. Poe
5. Bailey
6. The Pond
7. Random walks
8. My friends
9. Sunny days
10. Green grass
11. Golf range
12. Badminton
13. Salad
14. Pasta
15. Fish
16. Sleep
17. Sex
18. Duvets
19. Hugs
20. Kisses
21. Flirting
22. Compliments
23. Smiling at random people
24. Underwear
25. Porn
26. Photography
27. Art
28. Writing stuffs
29. Holding hands
30. Ex (sometimes) and Friend R
32. Singing
33. Dancing
34. Jumping
35. Sleepovers
36. Parties
37. Seeing
38. Men
39. Women
40. Cocks
41. Boobs
42. Moisturiser
43. Vaseline
44. Sandwichs
45. McDonalds
46. KFC
47. Cinema
48. Bowling
49. Grabber machines
50. Dancemat
51. Air hockey (tennis)
52. Pool
53. Pictionary
54. TV
55. Milkshakes
56. Apple juice
57. Alcohol
58. Being drunk
59. Kissing random people
60. Fit people
61. Bitching
62. Puppies
63. Daisy + Pixie
64. Music
65. Ice cubes
66. Cocktail sausages
67. Rolo icecream
68. Portugal
69. Beaches
70. Shells
71. Lady birds
72. Showers
73. Baths
74. Candles
75. Foot spas
76. Plays
77. Horoscopes
78. Cartoons in mail on sunday
79. Shopping
80. Hotels
81. Mini bars
82. Sunbathing
83. Doodling
84. Sea monkeys
85. Driving
86. Bikes
87. Lighters
88. Cactus's
89. Friends the tv show
90. Skins the tv show
91. Jewellry
92. Socks
93. Running like a kid
94. Fans
95. Dresses
96. Feel good films.. they make me cry tho.
97. Crank phone calls
98. Long phone calls
99. Daisy chains
100. Strawberries
That was slightly difficult..not happy yet either..
=(
Xx
Monday, March 31, 2008
Saturday, March 22, 2008
Mouldy Turnips.
Lo' lo' lo' lo' lo'
Well.. i went to yet another party/gathering and was upset by the end... rejection sucks.
However.
Its not how it seemed to be, was apparently due to my drunkness. I recieved soooo many mixed signals from person er.. X and argh i got stroppy and eventually my whole entired world collapsed and i fell into a pile on the stairs and had a discussion with my tired friend.. he was really nice about it and made me feel happier.. no romantic interest there either BTW.
As you may realise.. this blog is more flowing-ish, i am using my dads wireless keyboard and can therefore type spaces easily!! =)
Anyway as i was saying, the rejectee is a guy that i realised i like a fair amount and well im not quite sure how he feels, after drunkenly declaring my undying love for him, well not quite, telling him i like him, he seemed uninterested. However i was informed he may be scared due to my significant sexual experience.. i have to say i was like LOL, not due to the scaredness, but due to the fact my sexual experience is based on one guy and around 20 guys when it comes to getting off (kissing) < sounds gay but some people might not know what i mean, wouldnt want people getting the wrong idea! lol. Anyway yeah i was LOLing away.. but apparently that is soo. But i do have my own theories on not being popular enough to be seen with him, or for him to be seen liking me.. because im obviously that grotesque and disgusting. Of course. But hey, time will tell i guess =) i do hope something comes out of it though.
Easter holidays noww.. I have psychology coursework to do, to do with Gestalt laws, specifically the wholistic theory (spelling?)
I say that because i like to sound intelligent, well vaguely, yet i am not! Im nothing but a lowlife tramp person, well not really. Im more like an average 17 year old. Nearly 18 may i add! May 10th.. hoping for a million presents from my millions of fans. Well more like a happy birthday comment from the known 2 readers i have..
Oh well, its all appreciated =)
Today has been unbelievably boring.. all ive done is have a driving lesson, it was interesting though as it was snowing/hailing as i tried to concentrate on a million other things, im getting better though! And other than that ive sat, and listened to music and eaten cocktail sausages. Oh and i just got scared by an imaginery spider..
But i did have a rather odd conversation with my parents (ooh i sound so english) about my car, in which my dad tried to persuade me to take a loan of £5000 from him and pay it back over 20 years making the total with interest that i pay back £40000. I was less than impressed, this was while my mother was literally fighting me to hold my hand, she would not give up and i was more than a little scared by it, was really strange.. i said i didnt like it and she just said 'hold my hand!' so i kind of gave in then slyly wandered off. She also said i wasnt allowed to go out tonight due to me being out the last 3 nights, which is fairly random. I dont see the problem.. oh well.
My back is hurting from sitting in a weird position, and i think i may of finally run out of things to say, all be it nothing here is THAT interesting.
Toodleloo
Xx..
Well.. i went to yet another party/gathering and was upset by the end... rejection sucks.
However.
Its not how it seemed to be, was apparently due to my drunkness. I recieved soooo many mixed signals from person er.. X and argh i got stroppy and eventually my whole entired world collapsed and i fell into a pile on the stairs and had a discussion with my tired friend.. he was really nice about it and made me feel happier.. no romantic interest there either BTW.
As you may realise.. this blog is more flowing-ish, i am using my dads wireless keyboard and can therefore type spaces easily!! =)
Anyway as i was saying, the rejectee is a guy that i realised i like a fair amount and well im not quite sure how he feels, after drunkenly declaring my undying love for him, well not quite, telling him i like him, he seemed uninterested. However i was informed he may be scared due to my significant sexual experience.. i have to say i was like LOL, not due to the scaredness, but due to the fact my sexual experience is based on one guy and around 20 guys when it comes to getting off (kissing) < sounds gay but some people might not know what i mean, wouldnt want people getting the wrong idea! lol. Anyway yeah i was LOLing away.. but apparently that is soo. But i do have my own theories on not being popular enough to be seen with him, or for him to be seen liking me.. because im obviously that grotesque and disgusting. Of course. But hey, time will tell i guess =) i do hope something comes out of it though.
Easter holidays noww.. I have psychology coursework to do, to do with Gestalt laws, specifically the wholistic theory (spelling?)
I say that because i like to sound intelligent, well vaguely, yet i am not! Im nothing but a lowlife tramp person, well not really. Im more like an average 17 year old. Nearly 18 may i add! May 10th.. hoping for a million presents from my millions of fans. Well more like a happy birthday comment from the known 2 readers i have..
Oh well, its all appreciated =)
Today has been unbelievably boring.. all ive done is have a driving lesson, it was interesting though as it was snowing/hailing as i tried to concentrate on a million other things, im getting better though! And other than that ive sat, and listened to music and eaten cocktail sausages. Oh and i just got scared by an imaginery spider..
But i did have a rather odd conversation with my parents (ooh i sound so english) about my car, in which my dad tried to persuade me to take a loan of £5000 from him and pay it back over 20 years making the total with interest that i pay back £40000. I was less than impressed, this was while my mother was literally fighting me to hold my hand, she would not give up and i was more than a little scared by it, was really strange.. i said i didnt like it and she just said 'hold my hand!' so i kind of gave in then slyly wandered off. She also said i wasnt allowed to go out tonight due to me being out the last 3 nights, which is fairly random. I dont see the problem.. oh well.
My back is hurting from sitting in a weird position, and i think i may of finally run out of things to say, all be it nothing here is THAT interesting.
Toodleloo
Xx..
Tuesday, March 18, 2008
Karma..
Happy..Happy? Happy!
I wasnt earlier.. but i am now..! =)
I fell out with someone..ish.. and id ignored a text from someone else to lend something, then later i decided to text back and go find what they wanted..And things got better =)
Someone invited me out
Someone gave me compliments and was uber nice
Someone was tres nice
Someone was interested
=)
Andddd i have orange squash!
ME thinks that karma exists
Well..
I am a believer in god also.. so could be that too.
When i say im a believer in god.. i guess its a vaguely Christian view, im sceptical about Jesus but i believe theres something. Its pretty mind blowing thinking something/someone created everything and is out there watching, bigger than the universe? in the universe? outside? everywhere?
Where does the universe end? i personally see it being in a box with more space on the outside. I cant comprehend anything else. So its all good.
When i get a new keyboard i shall write longer blogs, however atm... im finding the spacing difficult.
Xx..
I wasnt earlier.. but i am now..! =)
I fell out with someone..ish.. and id ignored a text from someone else to lend something, then later i decided to text back and go find what they wanted..And things got better =)
Someone invited me out
Someone gave me compliments and was uber nice
Someone was tres nice
Someone was interested
=)
Andddd i have orange squash!
ME thinks that karma exists
Well..
I am a believer in god also.. so could be that too.
When i say im a believer in god.. i guess its a vaguely Christian view, im sceptical about Jesus but i believe theres something. Its pretty mind blowing thinking something/someone created everything and is out there watching, bigger than the universe? in the universe? outside? everywhere?
Where does the universe end? i personally see it being in a box with more space on the outside. I cant comprehend anything else. So its all good.
When i get a new keyboard i shall write longer blogs, however atm... im finding the spacing difficult.
Xx..
Saturday, March 15, 2008
Cold Shiny Hard Plastic.
ARRRR...
I punched ex last night.. HI5! lol
MEh
Im fed up with everyone being so frickin fake. I cant do what i want coz its weird.
Guess im too different to be friends with some people.. so called friends. Canniiii be assed.
SERIOUSLY
Everyone thinks theyre so great and pretty and amazing. Heads up asses comes to mind.
Fucking Retards.
Wish theyd just be more tolerant. So fucking retarded.
Plastic.
Oh dearr.... i be an angry person lol.
Keep saying ill leave, keep saying ill say what i think, keep saying if im too weird for people they can go fuck themselves..
But i doubt it will happen. Not now anyway.
My friends mean everything, but to some i mean nothing..
[Some Stuartina =) not you lol]
Xx
I punched ex last night.. HI5! lol
MEh
Im fed up with everyone being so frickin fake. I cant do what i want coz its weird.
Guess im too different to be friends with some people.. so called friends. Canniiii be assed.
SERIOUSLY
Everyone thinks theyre so great and pretty and amazing. Heads up asses comes to mind.
Fucking Retards.
Wish theyd just be more tolerant. So fucking retarded.
Plastic.
Oh dearr.... i be an angry person lol.
Keep saying ill leave, keep saying ill say what i think, keep saying if im too weird for people they can go fuck themselves..
But i doubt it will happen. Not now anyway.
My friends mean everything, but to some i mean nothing..
[Some Stuartina =) not you lol]
Xx
Sunday, March 9, 2008
FLUCVKCDFGH
Since when has one persons problem been only theirs?
What happened to friends that care?
What happened to friends that are there for you?!
I swear everyone is so far up their own asses they dont notice when someone is unhappy.
I get called names nonstop.. and people are always like oh she will be fine, she always laughs it off.
Ever heard of a front? most of the time i dont laugh it off, most of the time i sit thinking about whats been said, thinking it over and over.
What can i do to make myself better?
What can i do so people accept me?
What can i do to not get singled out.
When someone has a problem, anyone, regardless of if i know them or not. I will try and help, try and make them feel better, try and find a solution, be there for reassurance.. but it seems theres very few people like that.
Recently ive been pretty caught up in stuff and havent exactly found the time for certain friends.. and ARGH i hate it. Its so retarded.
I just want to be happy! Is that really too much to ask? Really?
Xx
What happened to friends that care?
What happened to friends that are there for you?!
I swear everyone is so far up their own asses they dont notice when someone is unhappy.
I get called names nonstop.. and people are always like oh she will be fine, she always laughs it off.
Ever heard of a front? most of the time i dont laugh it off, most of the time i sit thinking about whats been said, thinking it over and over.
What can i do to make myself better?
What can i do so people accept me?
What can i do to not get singled out.
When someone has a problem, anyone, regardless of if i know them or not. I will try and help, try and make them feel better, try and find a solution, be there for reassurance.. but it seems theres very few people like that.
Recently ive been pretty caught up in stuff and havent exactly found the time for certain friends.. and ARGH i hate it. Its so retarded.
I just want to be happy! Is that really too much to ask? Really?
Xx
Thingssss Can Only Gettt Worssserrrr...
http://majorly.deviantart.com/art/One-Day-You-Will-See-79475484
Basically describes how im feeling right now. Well as i wrote it.
Not really a poem, but i didnt know how to classify it..
Xx..
Basically describes how im feeling right now. Well as i wrote it.
Not really a poem, but i didnt know how to classify it..
Xx..
Saturday, March 1, 2008
Chav? No Way!
=O
I pulled a chav..
Lol. Hehe.
Well, i went out with mon amie and met a million people we know in the arcade.. (what? im not 18 yet.. theres nothing to do! lol) and then met a chav who was fit may i add, and a balding druggy.. luckily i got the chav. =)
Unfortunately, i returned home and told fluffy i got with someone and mon amie recieved a text at 1am saying 'thank fuck for that, now i can get on people' from fluffy. BLEH.
Screwed myself there.
Also.
There is another guy, who was there last night whom i didnt go see. But i wish i did.. =( hes soooo like me-ish lol, and hes funny and fit, but slightly annoying sometimes but then again im pretty annoying all the time! I thinks i annoyed him tho =( so im just going to have to wait it out i guess! Hes so awesome though. But like im so retarded! arhghghh..
Fluffy out with someone because hes not back from work. =( i such a paranoid person! oh dearrr....
Mothers day tomorrow, got a rose bush and chocolates. And im driving her up to my nans maybe.
OhMyGod. I cant stop thinking about him..
GAHHHH.
Xx..
I pulled a chav..
Lol. Hehe.
Well, i went out with mon amie and met a million people we know in the arcade.. (what? im not 18 yet.. theres nothing to do! lol) and then met a chav who was fit may i add, and a balding druggy.. luckily i got the chav. =)
Unfortunately, i returned home and told fluffy i got with someone and mon amie recieved a text at 1am saying 'thank fuck for that, now i can get on people' from fluffy. BLEH.
Screwed myself there.
Also.
There is another guy, who was there last night whom i didnt go see. But i wish i did.. =( hes soooo like me-ish lol, and hes funny and fit, but slightly annoying sometimes but then again im pretty annoying all the time! I thinks i annoyed him tho =( so im just going to have to wait it out i guess! Hes so awesome though. But like im so retarded! arhghghh..
Fluffy out with someone because hes not back from work. =( i such a paranoid person! oh dearrr....
Mothers day tomorrow, got a rose bush and chocolates. And im driving her up to my nans maybe.
OhMyGod. I cant stop thinking about him..
GAHHHH.
Xx..
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