Yo yo yo mini hoes..
Yeah. Well.. i think my bf is trying to drug me coz he brought me back some 'sweets' shaped like pebbles and like they made me go mental.. could just of been sugar high but i felt drunk lol!
Said some stupid things to people aswell lol.
Got 2 parties this weekend! wooo
Hopefully i wont do anything too stupidiful. lol ive ran around outside freezing with no top , cheated, sang really bad kareoke and done really bad dancemat and fallen down the stairs, plus the obvious throwing up and passing out.. lol im a light weight so sue me.
My computer is being so gay! trying to close things down to stop it.. dont know whyyyyy.. hold on.
Ok i deleted cookies and shizzle and its faster now =)
Well.. today was alright.. i realised actually how weak i am when it comes to certain things.. mainly arms and stomachs.. of the male tanned variety. Oh god lol. I need to be able to control myself at these parties as the person in question will be at one of them! lol. Its so funny i act like a complete shlag, but people have learnt to turn me down now coz i just out for some and bf gets pissed off. Next time i do it its going to be dumpage 'r' me. lol. Nearly broke up the other day.. conversations starting with 'do you think we ever be happy?' 'no' are never going to be good..
But it did end alright and we are still together.. i think im losing interest, yet when we nearly break up i always nearly end up crying! And i dont know why lol.
Did about defence strategies today in psychology, the narcissistic, the perfectionist, the arrogant- vindictive and resigned people. Im more resigned with the fear of failing and if i dont try i cant fail or be disappointed, believe in freedom, peace and self sufficiency. My bf is the narcissistic.. meaning he loves himself, has no doubt in his own greatness and find it hard to empathize and love others. LOL. And finally my troublesome friend is a arrogant-vindictive she knows shes good and is over confident in that and makes others feel bad by it, will not be influenced by softer feelings and has no grasp of morality.. therefore relationships are hard and what may been seen as obviously wrong by some people would not even be given a second thought by her. This is due to apparent psychological injuries recieved in childhood.. but she hasnt been bullied or anything, that i know of, known her since age 9. lol i was bullied alot but im alrightish lol. Although im insecure, attention seeking and paranoid. lol.
As i said in the last blog, basically i meant that to stop their heads getting big the media is there to bring them back to reality, doesnt really work but hey. Wish someone would write an article on some of the people i know to make them have a reality check and grow up a bit lol.
Im immature sometimes.. but not in an unrealistic way, i swear some people i know have no grasp of reality atall! i have an extreme imagination but i can still tell reality from fantasy.
Arhgd im gabbling again.. lol
PEBBLES.
LOL i havent had any but im really happy, i think its 'cause the sun is back! I love ittttt..
lol
=)
OMG italy soon.
Ive had no sex for 4 weeks.. 4 weeks.. 4... weeks.
sorry. yeah.
URMDFHSAa..
Byee xx
Wednesday, January 30, 2008
Friday, January 25, 2008
Revelations And Tiredness
Ive had a revelation! The media is there to stop celebrities getting big headed! lol.
As im neurotic and insecure.. i tend not to get big headed for too long, my feet are FIRMLY on the ground.. most of the time.
To Be Continued..
Im too tired now..started it earlier lol
Xx
As im neurotic and insecure.. i tend not to get big headed for too long, my feet are FIRMLY on the ground.. most of the time.
To Be Continued..
Im too tired now..started it earlier lol
Xx
Thursday, January 24, 2008
He Be Living, Ye Olde Sea Monkeyeth Bobeth..
From now for the next week or so.. im laying off my mate. Shes going to get an earful tomorrow from everyone else, probably is right now.
But atleast it takes attention away from me for not doing the sixth form chlamydia test, as i was down town with bf because he be going to spain tomorrow. I cant have it, really, i cant lol.
I had a good day today! lol learnt about creation and stuff.. i cant remember loads of it because i got other things onmy mind. But it was so weird, like comparing darwins evolutionary theory against I.D - intelligent design -the idea that there is a designer that is extremely smart and created everything, like god but less biblical. How can things work so perfectly, only through natural selection? Without a missing link it has been proved mathematically impossible for natural selection to be responsible for who we are today. There are monkeys, there are humans, but theres no inbetween.. well apparently, i thought they found skeletons n that.. but apparently theres still a missing link. A Bacteria found to be propelled by a kind of propellor like what is found on a boat, was discovered around 30 years ago, how is it we designed that device for aboat without knowing about that? We designed it.. so how could nature design it that way. It was like ooohhh head fuck! lol
Psychology was also pretty good , introduction to next unit PYB5.. sounded pretty interesting, kinda hard though as its the synoptic paper. And maths i had to get in a group with some random year 12s as im doing retakeAS because i failed last year. My task is to do mathematical dominoes game! fun fun. lol
I felt embarassed to be with someone i shouldnt, ive felt it before, felt it at the begining, felt it when i wasnt in love. I really dont know what to do.. smeghdhfghds
Lol smeg.. ur in a smeg with me!! haha, ahh middle school was awesome with those strange phrases and yoyos and squigy aliens. But Lower school was awesomer! lol
I miss being young.. you never feel that innocent and happy ever again.. i know im only 17 but how can you.. really?
Reverse everything bad you've seen/done, have the sexual habbits of a nun (habbits..lol get it?), pray for your memory to be erased.. create world peace and become a tree hugger?
Not likely to happen. We have Gordon Brown running our country for goodness sake. And George Bush overseas. Weapons too.. they contribute.. just slightly..lol.
I have uno sea monkey...! saw it swimming around yesterday, i hope it survives! im trying my bestest.
Xx
But atleast it takes attention away from me for not doing the sixth form chlamydia test, as i was down town with bf because he be going to spain tomorrow. I cant have it, really, i cant lol.
I had a good day today! lol learnt about creation and stuff.. i cant remember loads of it because i got other things onmy mind. But it was so weird, like comparing darwins evolutionary theory against I.D - intelligent design -the idea that there is a designer that is extremely smart and created everything, like god but less biblical. How can things work so perfectly, only through natural selection? Without a missing link it has been proved mathematically impossible for natural selection to be responsible for who we are today. There are monkeys, there are humans, but theres no inbetween.. well apparently, i thought they found skeletons n that.. but apparently theres still a missing link. A Bacteria found to be propelled by a kind of propellor like what is found on a boat, was discovered around 30 years ago, how is it we designed that device for aboat without knowing about that? We designed it.. so how could nature design it that way. It was like ooohhh head fuck! lol
Psychology was also pretty good , introduction to next unit PYB5.. sounded pretty interesting, kinda hard though as its the synoptic paper. And maths i had to get in a group with some random year 12s as im doing retakeAS because i failed last year. My task is to do mathematical dominoes game! fun fun. lol
I felt embarassed to be with someone i shouldnt, ive felt it before, felt it at the begining, felt it when i wasnt in love. I really dont know what to do.. smeghdhfghds
Lol smeg.. ur in a smeg with me!! haha, ahh middle school was awesome with those strange phrases and yoyos and squigy aliens. But Lower school was awesomer! lol
I miss being young.. you never feel that innocent and happy ever again.. i know im only 17 but how can you.. really?
Reverse everything bad you've seen/done, have the sexual habbits of a nun (habbits..lol get it?), pray for your memory to be erased.. create world peace and become a tree hugger?
Not likely to happen. We have Gordon Brown running our country for goodness sake. And George Bush overseas. Weapons too.. they contribute.. just slightly..lol.
I have uno sea monkey...! saw it swimming around yesterday, i hope it survives! im trying my bestest.
Xx
Wednesday, January 23, 2008
I'll Knock You Out BIATCH!
Todays been a weird day..
I told someone to fuck off because i got so angry.. i stormed out because i felt i was going to punch someone.. i walked down to town because i needed to cry. I sat on a bench and watched the people walk past me and watched how they looked at me or how they didnt.. Its so strange, i hoped that one of them might stop and give me some miracle advice or make me happy.
But noone stopped. Noone spoke. Noone really gave me a look of compassion.
I got a look of disgust from an old woman with a long skirt and pearly white hair.. probably the music i was listening to, heavy rock on full blast on my ipod. Its a disgrace that i can listen to the music i want.. obviously means im a drug abusing alcoholic.
Anyway.. I have been ditched yet again by my 'best' friend.. she says oooh your my best friend and says she loves me. But... doesnt listen to me, leaves me for other people and gangs up on me. Im the one person that will stand up to her as noone else can be bothered with the hassle. If you get on my wrong side you'll know it, not many people argue with me either. Was quite funny her bf said that people should be scared of me , as if they got on my wrong side id probably knock em out lol. Bless.
Got a pretty high score on wii boxing.. so you never know!
I also had muscle pain for 3 days after...lol
I feel lonely. But not because i am, because im not like the rest of my friends.. if your reading this and your think arhfhg shes one of them who thinks shes different and unique and all that emo shizzle. Im not, i just think in a different way to them and its making me tres unhappy.. its like im either really stupid, or really smart. Most people say im stupid. Figures.
Then ill ask the people i know and theyll say that im smart and complicated. Id like to be simple, but smart isnt all that bad i guess!
You know what i wish this blog had a proper hit counter and stuff.. coz its actually a penis.
Xx
I told someone to fuck off because i got so angry.. i stormed out because i felt i was going to punch someone.. i walked down to town because i needed to cry. I sat on a bench and watched the people walk past me and watched how they looked at me or how they didnt.. Its so strange, i hoped that one of them might stop and give me some miracle advice or make me happy.
But noone stopped. Noone spoke. Noone really gave me a look of compassion.
I got a look of disgust from an old woman with a long skirt and pearly white hair.. probably the music i was listening to, heavy rock on full blast on my ipod. Its a disgrace that i can listen to the music i want.. obviously means im a drug abusing alcoholic.
Anyway.. I have been ditched yet again by my 'best' friend.. she says oooh your my best friend and says she loves me. But... doesnt listen to me, leaves me for other people and gangs up on me. Im the one person that will stand up to her as noone else can be bothered with the hassle. If you get on my wrong side you'll know it, not many people argue with me either. Was quite funny her bf said that people should be scared of me , as if they got on my wrong side id probably knock em out lol. Bless.
Got a pretty high score on wii boxing.. so you never know!
I also had muscle pain for 3 days after...lol
I feel lonely. But not because i am, because im not like the rest of my friends.. if your reading this and your think arhfhg shes one of them who thinks shes different and unique and all that emo shizzle. Im not, i just think in a different way to them and its making me tres unhappy.. its like im either really stupid, or really smart. Most people say im stupid. Figures.
Then ill ask the people i know and theyll say that im smart and complicated. Id like to be simple, but smart isnt all that bad i guess!
You know what i wish this blog had a proper hit counter and stuff.. coz its actually a penis.
Xx
Friday, January 18, 2008
Happy Pills? Anyone?
GRARGGHGHHGHG...
Bf is sooo gna break up with me soon. Again.
I dont want to, but then i do. If we break up i wanna be the one doing the breaking up. Not him. Again.
The only way i keep him interested is by acting like im not. How fucked up.
He likes the chase.. like me. Im always chasing him.. Always.
Hes emotionally detached from everything.. its retarded.
Selfish and narcesistic. ARGH.
Im not a great gf myself, not that most people know, him certainly not.. the things i say to people lol.
If he was doing the same i'd be so annoyed.
Anyway.
One exam left.. took double dose of calming pills today they worked better.. but i was still stressed. Maybe 6 will work lol.
Spent the night in tonight.. coz i was asleep when everyone went out. Been a shit night.. all ive thought about is him, how hes out and didnt want to see me, all the shit hes said to me.. listening to songs about how men like him are cunts. Lol. If you met him you might think he was nice.. bit camp but nice. No hes not gay. But other people will say it too.. hes in stuff for himself if he dont want to do something. He wont. No comprimise. Hes lucky hes got a gf that lets him walk all over her.. if he started treatin some other girl like this she wud tell him to piss off. But he never used to be this bad. My 'friends' changed him. They all roll with the crowd and i tend to have my own opinion and do what i want. But hes weak i guess.
If anyone is reading this.. sorry for rambling about shiz.. lol. I hope its interesting. Bet its not though lol. It will be more interesting when i get happy. If, i get happy.
Oh and theyre doing chlaymedia tests on upper sixth form. How actualy retarded. I have a lesson clash with careers so i hope i dont have to do one. I dont have it, i know i dont. Its just retarded!
..Xx
Bf is sooo gna break up with me soon. Again.
I dont want to, but then i do. If we break up i wanna be the one doing the breaking up. Not him. Again.
The only way i keep him interested is by acting like im not. How fucked up.
He likes the chase.. like me. Im always chasing him.. Always.
Hes emotionally detached from everything.. its retarded.
Selfish and narcesistic. ARGH.
Im not a great gf myself, not that most people know, him certainly not.. the things i say to people lol.
If he was doing the same i'd be so annoyed.
Anyway.
One exam left.. took double dose of calming pills today they worked better.. but i was still stressed. Maybe 6 will work lol.
Spent the night in tonight.. coz i was asleep when everyone went out. Been a shit night.. all ive thought about is him, how hes out and didnt want to see me, all the shit hes said to me.. listening to songs about how men like him are cunts. Lol. If you met him you might think he was nice.. bit camp but nice. No hes not gay. But other people will say it too.. hes in stuff for himself if he dont want to do something. He wont. No comprimise. Hes lucky hes got a gf that lets him walk all over her.. if he started treatin some other girl like this she wud tell him to piss off. But he never used to be this bad. My 'friends' changed him. They all roll with the crowd and i tend to have my own opinion and do what i want. But hes weak i guess.
If anyone is reading this.. sorry for rambling about shiz.. lol. I hope its interesting. Bet its not though lol. It will be more interesting when i get happy. If, i get happy.
Oh and theyre doing chlaymedia tests on upper sixth form. How actualy retarded. I have a lesson clash with careers so i hope i dont have to do one. I dont have it, i know i dont. Its just retarded!
..Xx
Grrr.. Medication Please.
Bleh..
Been a while.
My stress levels still arent falling.. im on the verge of mental breakdown..
lol
From exams, school and love.
The press say that a levels are easy.. easiest ever. Apparently.
Then why is it large majority of my friends are now taking anti stress pills.. no they arent on drugs.. herbal remedies to calm you down.
Me. Yeah im on them too.. but theyre not helping that much atall..
The anxiety attacks came back last night. Thought theyd gone for a while.. guess not.
Bf just tried to convince me hes gay.. he has a history of gay encounters so it is fairly believeable, that and his flamboyant personality.. so i rang him up nearly crying.. knots in my stomach.. in disbelief.. shocked. So he says he wanted to know my reaction.. well thanks alot.. he was just bored.
He gets like this when hes stressed turns into a complete cunt, im the first thing he cuts off when he gets annoyed. Then comes crawling back.. the amount of times ive been ditched because of some kind of drama coursework or performance. Its currently coursework. Joy. Hes dropped so many hints he doesnt want me /is going to dump me.. and he thinks im paranoid. Said it once, said it a thousand times if you recorded what you said then played it back you would think you were a cunt to. We made a revelation today. We love each other, but dont actually like each other. He is a pompuss,vain, arrogant, son of a whore.. but i love him. Why?! I dont even know anymore.
Xx..
Been a while.
My stress levels still arent falling.. im on the verge of mental breakdown..
lol
From exams, school and love.
The press say that a levels are easy.. easiest ever. Apparently.
Then why is it large majority of my friends are now taking anti stress pills.. no they arent on drugs.. herbal remedies to calm you down.
Me. Yeah im on them too.. but theyre not helping that much atall..
The anxiety attacks came back last night. Thought theyd gone for a while.. guess not.
Bf just tried to convince me hes gay.. he has a history of gay encounters so it is fairly believeable, that and his flamboyant personality.. so i rang him up nearly crying.. knots in my stomach.. in disbelief.. shocked. So he says he wanted to know my reaction.. well thanks alot.. he was just bored.
He gets like this when hes stressed turns into a complete cunt, im the first thing he cuts off when he gets annoyed. Then comes crawling back.. the amount of times ive been ditched because of some kind of drama coursework or performance. Its currently coursework. Joy. Hes dropped so many hints he doesnt want me /is going to dump me.. and he thinks im paranoid. Said it once, said it a thousand times if you recorded what you said then played it back you would think you were a cunt to. We made a revelation today. We love each other, but dont actually like each other. He is a pompuss,vain, arrogant, son of a whore.. but i love him. Why?! I dont even know anymore.
Xx..
Friday, January 11, 2008
Lonely Times..Call For Lonely Music..
I missed wednesday.. and today is still my thursday.. although it technically isnt.
Bf came over tonight.. and i cried when he left for no apparent reason.. and nearly did at various points during the evening.. lol..
Its hard only enjoying a few things.. very few. and the main one being scrutinised by everyone who knows me..
I was the little shy girl.. who walked round the guttering of the playground by herself..
Now.. im something better or worse..
I havent quite decided yet..
x..
Bf came over tonight.. and i cried when he left for no apparent reason.. and nearly did at various points during the evening.. lol..
Its hard only enjoying a few things.. very few. and the main one being scrutinised by everyone who knows me..
I was the little shy girl.. who walked round the guttering of the playground by herself..
Now.. im something better or worse..
I havent quite decided yet..
x..
Tuesday, January 8, 2008
I Am An Unemployed Bum.. Looking For Employment.
Its so strange how things can switch round so quickly..
Someone becomes less interested i become more interested..
Its what keeps me and the bf together..
I get bored when hes nice..so its lucky he isnt.
Lol.
I screw myself really. Tbh.
If i liked nice guys i would be fine.
But i dont so i get bored of the nice guys.. i like someone who will keep me interested..
But i also have an unbelievable urge to have a bit on the side..
The mind is a funny thing.
Got C1 exam tomorrow (maths exam), have been revising all day today well since 2.. till half 8ish. I could concentrate.. strange lol. Im gonna buy some calms 'cause im a stress freak. Lol. And apparently repetitive too..
Oh well.
I got an average grade on a mock paper.. a miracle.. indeed.
I need to get a job.. but everything seems so boring.. oh stacking shelves. FUN.
I either stack shelves or hang clothes. Or get a paper round. Dont think so some how!
I once had an ambition to become prime minister.. lol how gay does that sound. I have pretty poor people skills when it comes to people i dont know.. i wouldnt do very well.
I should be getting some sleep and dreaming of maths sheep.
Taraaaa..x
Someone becomes less interested i become more interested..
Its what keeps me and the bf together..
I get bored when hes nice..so its lucky he isnt.
Lol.
I screw myself really. Tbh.
If i liked nice guys i would be fine.
But i dont so i get bored of the nice guys.. i like someone who will keep me interested..
But i also have an unbelievable urge to have a bit on the side..
The mind is a funny thing.
Got C1 exam tomorrow (maths exam), have been revising all day today well since 2.. till half 8ish. I could concentrate.. strange lol. Im gonna buy some calms 'cause im a stress freak. Lol. And apparently repetitive too..
Oh well.
I got an average grade on a mock paper.. a miracle.. indeed.
I need to get a job.. but everything seems so boring.. oh stacking shelves. FUN.
I either stack shelves or hang clothes. Or get a paper round. Dont think so some how!
I once had an ambition to become prime minister.. lol how gay does that sound. I have pretty poor people skills when it comes to people i dont know.. i wouldnt do very well.
I should be getting some sleep and dreaming of maths sheep.
Taraaaa..x
Monday, January 7, 2008
My Heart Missed A Beat..
I don't know what it is with me..
I argue so much!
I get stroppy and paranoid.. with the slightest thing that doesn't go how i wanted it to.
I gotten hurt so many times.. coz im a retard. =(
Just making him angry makes me sad..
I could cry right now.. just thinking about what could happen.
=(
..x
I argue so much!
I get stroppy and paranoid.. with the slightest thing that doesn't go how i wanted it to.
I gotten hurt so many times.. coz im a retard. =(
Just making him angry makes me sad..
I could cry right now.. just thinking about what could happen.
=(
..x
Sunday, January 6, 2008
Love Love.. Love Lovely Love..!
Okay.. so maybe i over did it yesterday..
I spoke to him.. chinese whispers and misunderstandings.
But im not that bothered right now anyway.
I just realised how much i love my bf =)
He's an arse but can be a complete angel sometimes.. he suprises me now and again.
And its great when he does!
Anyway..
I spent about 7 hours putting my bloody wardrobe together.. first i dragged it up the stairs.. and wrestled it into my bedroom.. then broke it.. then super glued it.. and my fingers. Then i wrestled it out of my bedroom and put it together. HOWEVER. The instructions were rubbish or im stupid.. probably the latter tbh. I put it together wrong 5! times. My fingers are glued and splintered and blistered. But i succesfully put all 28 pieces together.. eventually.. and it looks alright, certainly safe. I guess thats all that matters when its behind closed doors.
AYO Technology - Great sex song.
Anyway..
Well i thought about putting my deviantart page on some letters.. but as it links to my blog i will not be doing that as im sure my family really dont want to know.. or admit that their little niece, daughter, grandaughter, cousin etc.. involves herself in such things.
Is it just me or do alot of people find it difficult to put i's and e's in the right order.
I before e except after c.. as i go through checking everything.
Blah
Im dying from a headache and i think a cold. A COLD! For blimeys sake. Not happy.
I slave away over a wardrobe all day and what do i get? ..A sore throat from the dust and wood and shizzle.
Im going to Italy soooooooon. Skiing!
Missing valentines day though =(
But im planning a special thing for my bf for him to open on the 14th. Although i don't think he will wait/ appreciate it.. but i dont mind.. 'cause i lurveee him =)
I should stay in captivity, because when i go out i convince myself i like many other guys.. many.
I like a chase kinda.. thing . =)
Lotsaluvnstuff..x
I spoke to him.. chinese whispers and misunderstandings.
But im not that bothered right now anyway.
I just realised how much i love my bf =)
He's an arse but can be a complete angel sometimes.. he suprises me now and again.
And its great when he does!
Anyway..
I spent about 7 hours putting my bloody wardrobe together.. first i dragged it up the stairs.. and wrestled it into my bedroom.. then broke it.. then super glued it.. and my fingers. Then i wrestled it out of my bedroom and put it together. HOWEVER. The instructions were rubbish or im stupid.. probably the latter tbh. I put it together wrong 5! times. My fingers are glued and splintered and blistered. But i succesfully put all 28 pieces together.. eventually.. and it looks alright, certainly safe. I guess thats all that matters when its behind closed doors.
AYO Technology - Great sex song.
Anyway..
Well i thought about putting my deviantart page on some letters.. but as it links to my blog i will not be doing that as im sure my family really dont want to know.. or admit that their little niece, daughter, grandaughter, cousin etc.. involves herself in such things.
Is it just me or do alot of people find it difficult to put i's and e's in the right order.
I before e except after c.. as i go through checking everything.
Blah
Im dying from a headache and i think a cold. A COLD! For blimeys sake. Not happy.
I slave away over a wardrobe all day and what do i get? ..A sore throat from the dust and wood and shizzle.
Im going to Italy soooooooon. Skiing!
Missing valentines day though =(
But im planning a special thing for my bf for him to open on the 14th. Although i don't think he will wait/ appreciate it.. but i dont mind.. 'cause i lurveee him =)
I should stay in captivity, because when i go out i convince myself i like many other guys.. many.
I like a chase kinda.. thing . =)
Lotsaluvnstuff..x
Saturday, January 5, 2008
I Will Contradict Myself And I Will Be Right.
Why are men such twats?
Complete arseholes. Liars.
Well some.
You dont tell one person you like them, then a week later you like someone else.
SERIOUSLY.
Luckily for me i was only pulling him along anyway. See women can be arseholes too.
Its just the principle of it. Hurt my fucking pride why dont you.
Atleast you didnt know i was playing you off.
Im telling you now, if i say i like you (like that) i probably dont. I just like the playing around with people like.. mentally not physically. So unless i prove it, i dont. Proving it consists of actually going to see you. Sorry mate. But i really cudnt be assed.
Lol im such a hypocrit. Oh well men are tough they can handle it.
I mean if your going to try to get on someone with a boyfriend your treading on unsteady ground anyway..DUH.
Anyway,
Driving lesson today! Im getting better =)
Then went and got a wardrobe, as i havent had one in like.. 5 years. Yay.
And went shopping, saw bf and couple of mates, plus arsehole 1 and arseholes less arseholish sidekick..(arsehole 2)
Had a blueberry muffin =)
Now im waiting for the fireworks to start (not literally)
; )
Lotsaluvnstuff..x
Complete arseholes. Liars.
Well some.
You dont tell one person you like them, then a week later you like someone else.
SERIOUSLY.
Luckily for me i was only pulling him along anyway. See women can be arseholes too.
Its just the principle of it. Hurt my fucking pride why dont you.
Atleast you didnt know i was playing you off.
Im telling you now, if i say i like you (like that) i probably dont. I just like the playing around with people like.. mentally not physically. So unless i prove it, i dont. Proving it consists of actually going to see you. Sorry mate. But i really cudnt be assed.
Lol im such a hypocrit. Oh well men are tough they can handle it.
I mean if your going to try to get on someone with a boyfriend your treading on unsteady ground anyway..DUH.
Anyway,
Driving lesson today! Im getting better =)
Then went and got a wardrobe, as i havent had one in like.. 5 years. Yay.
And went shopping, saw bf and couple of mates, plus arsehole 1 and arseholes less arseholish sidekick..(arsehole 2)
Had a blueberry muffin =)
Now im waiting for the fireworks to start (not literally)
; )
Lotsaluvnstuff..x
Friday, January 4, 2008
Stop Looking At My Crumpet!
'lo 'lo 'lo ♥
My sea monkeys are looking a little emo.. well dull/sad. =(
Anyway.
Today.. i spent 1st lesson plastic talking.. and 2nd stressing about an exam paper that was meant to be in several weeks ago. Turned out teacher didnt really care that much..
Got a mock exam result..got E/F , maybe i was marked down slightly..i soooo cudda got an E lol.
And i thought i did ok. Hah.
Later i was witness to more plastic talk.. followed by some self absorbed drama talk.. so me and one my mates journeyed across the vast park and through a housing estate to the local spar.. we were actually square by the time we got there (ice cubes) all for.. wait for it.. a cheese and ham sandwich and a packet of crumpets.
We returned and defrosted back in the common room. We toasted our crumpets and explored the fridge full of month old milk for butter.. 'low fat asda spread' does that count as butter? Spread. Cheese spread? Apple? Banana flavour?
Was probably mouldy anyway..
So we ate our dry crumpets and shoved some in my boyfriends direction.. when he stopped self absorbing.
Last lesson.. ARGH went over the rubbish E/F paper.. got hot and headachy.. and embarassed when asked how i found the exam.
How did i find it?! You marked it. Tard.
Went home on scanky/smelly bus. Driver stalled. Driver this morning broke gear box. Said we would die if we went round one roundabout.. but not if we went around another.. extrordinarily.
We lived, bf didnt reply to texts of final goodbyes.. lucky me.
Strange thing is ive always wondered what it would be like if my bus did crash.. travelled on it every school day since i was 9. The same journey twice a day needs a bit of livening up dont you think? If i got minorly hurt from a 'Terifying Catastrophy' oh the attention i would get. Maybe some appreciation too. Respect? Woah there.. thats pushing it.
Things that piss me off.
Girls or Guys with a significant other who treats them well, and girl or guy goes and flirts with other guys or girls. Especially in front of them.
I dont count. I said treated well. Bf does count however. Says alot.
Lotsaluvnstuff x
My sea monkeys are looking a little emo.. well dull/sad. =(
Anyway.
Today.. i spent 1st lesson plastic talking.. and 2nd stressing about an exam paper that was meant to be in several weeks ago. Turned out teacher didnt really care that much..
Got a mock exam result..got E/F , maybe i was marked down slightly..i soooo cudda got an E lol.
And i thought i did ok. Hah.
Later i was witness to more plastic talk.. followed by some self absorbed drama talk.. so me and one my mates journeyed across the vast park and through a housing estate to the local spar.. we were actually square by the time we got there (ice cubes) all for.. wait for it.. a cheese and ham sandwich and a packet of crumpets.
We returned and defrosted back in the common room. We toasted our crumpets and explored the fridge full of month old milk for butter.. 'low fat asda spread' does that count as butter? Spread. Cheese spread? Apple? Banana flavour?
Was probably mouldy anyway..
So we ate our dry crumpets and shoved some in my boyfriends direction.. when he stopped self absorbing.
Last lesson.. ARGH went over the rubbish E/F paper.. got hot and headachy.. and embarassed when asked how i found the exam.
How did i find it?! You marked it. Tard.
Went home on scanky/smelly bus. Driver stalled. Driver this morning broke gear box. Said we would die if we went round one roundabout.. but not if we went around another.. extrordinarily.
We lived, bf didnt reply to texts of final goodbyes.. lucky me.
Strange thing is ive always wondered what it would be like if my bus did crash.. travelled on it every school day since i was 9. The same journey twice a day needs a bit of livening up dont you think? If i got minorly hurt from a 'Terifying Catastrophy' oh the attention i would get. Maybe some appreciation too. Respect? Woah there.. thats pushing it.
Things that piss me off.
Girls or Guys with a significant other who treats them well, and girl or guy goes and flirts with other guys or girls. Especially in front of them.
I dont count. I said treated well. Bf does count however. Says alot.
Lotsaluvnstuff x
STRESS?!!?!
Stress...
STRESSED.
Ive turned into a monster =(
Woke up at 3..am.. went to bed at 2. Woke up again at 7.
Im tired and narky.
And ive.. missed lessons.. argued.. made up.. argued some more.. made excuses.. got confused.
Was hit, kicked, layed on, burnt (by hot chocolate)
Made to walk to town.. in the freezing cold and snow and wind.
So i decided to make a blog..
Ive decided i shouldnt post blogs on myspace anymore..as my friends think im a psycho if they read it and a very very sad person if i make it private.
Oh.. your writing a blog to yourself.. how lovely...... FREAK.
Yeah.. its like writing all this shizzle is therapy.. stress therapy..
My cheap anger management.
Im hoping to get a league of dedicated followers that i've never met.. that think im amazing and can do no wrong.
lol as if.
As this is mein first blog.. i guess i should write about myself if some random person unfortunately (for them) wanders (virtually) on/in to my blog.
Firstly may i say.. my flippin space bar is indeed broken-ish. So this isnt easy.
But im 17.. brown hair.. 5ft 6ish.. i have a wonky face.. but 'apparently' noone else notices.
Anyway..
Im nice.. well 'aww your so lovely'
Lovely?? umm... ok
Once i asked if that meant i was boring.. the reply was 'your ACTUALLY quite interesting'
Like they were suprised? Cheers mate.
I like photography, writing poems.. occassional story.
Singing, although noone will ever be witness unless im drunk.
Dancing, and again. Unless its just the average moving my ass to the beat as some guy harasses me.. me too drunk to notice.
Happens more than you would think.
Anyway yeah.. thats me.
Wait.
Oh LORDY i forgot the 'biggest' part of my life.
My 'beloved' Boyfriend.
Together since 11th November 2006.
He has broken up with me... around 6 times.
Made me cry, scream, shout, become an insomniac, become an anorexic.. kinda.. well for a week anyway, make suicide threats, drop my friends, blame my friends...
But.. i love him.
And i am a slight handful sometimes..
Because.. as i was saying.. im STRESSED.
Stress makes me so argumentative. If its not done my way its not right. Its not even moral.
If i was someone else.. i wouldnt like me.. probably.. maybe.
Im alot of things im not.
But more of that another time.
Im going to try and keep this up.
It kind of inspired by a book im reading.
Thats really good by the way.
Called..
The intimate adventures of a london call girl.
And no, i am not a prostitute.
Lotsaluvnstuff.. x
STRESSED.
Ive turned into a monster =(
Woke up at 3..am.. went to bed at 2. Woke up again at 7.
Im tired and narky.
And ive.. missed lessons.. argued.. made up.. argued some more.. made excuses.. got confused.
Was hit, kicked, layed on, burnt (by hot chocolate)
Made to walk to town.. in the freezing cold and snow and wind.
So i decided to make a blog..
Ive decided i shouldnt post blogs on myspace anymore..as my friends think im a psycho if they read it and a very very sad person if i make it private.
Oh.. your writing a blog to yourself.. how lovely...... FREAK.
Yeah.. its like writing all this shizzle is therapy.. stress therapy..
My cheap anger management.
Im hoping to get a league of dedicated followers that i've never met.. that think im amazing and can do no wrong.
lol as if.
As this is mein first blog.. i guess i should write about myself if some random person unfortunately (for them) wanders (virtually) on/in to my blog.
Firstly may i say.. my flippin space bar is indeed broken-ish. So this isnt easy.
But im 17.. brown hair.. 5ft 6ish.. i have a wonky face.. but 'apparently' noone else notices.
Anyway..
Im nice.. well 'aww your so lovely'
Lovely?? umm... ok
Once i asked if that meant i was boring.. the reply was 'your ACTUALLY quite interesting'
Like they were suprised? Cheers mate.
I like photography, writing poems.. occassional story.
Singing, although noone will ever be witness unless im drunk.
Dancing, and again. Unless its just the average moving my ass to the beat as some guy harasses me.. me too drunk to notice.
Happens more than you would think.
Anyway yeah.. thats me.
Wait.
Oh LORDY i forgot the 'biggest' part of my life.
My 'beloved' Boyfriend.
Together since 11th November 2006.
He has broken up with me... around 6 times.
Made me cry, scream, shout, become an insomniac, become an anorexic.. kinda.. well for a week anyway, make suicide threats, drop my friends, blame my friends...
But.. i love him.
And i am a slight handful sometimes..
Because.. as i was saying.. im STRESSED.
Stress makes me so argumentative. If its not done my way its not right. Its not even moral.
If i was someone else.. i wouldnt like me.. probably.. maybe.
Im alot of things im not.
But more of that another time.
Im going to try and keep this up.
It kind of inspired by a book im reading.
Thats really good by the way.
Called..
The intimate adventures of a london call girl.
And no, i am not a prostitute.
Lotsaluvnstuff.. x
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